To everything there may be a season, but I'm not sure what that means in
Bahia. I believe this could be one reason why people here seem to have no sense
of time. They can sit around in their homes doing nothing but watching TV for
days and days at a time and never feel like they've wasted a moment. As a
missionary, I feel like I'm in a time bubble. It's as if the world has actually
stopped turning and I'm just going to keep doing missionary work until it starts
again. The lack of changing seasons doesn't bother me when I'm keeping track of
time in mission transfers. But how do these people live their whole lives like
this?
There's a hazy laziness that seems to be draped over the people if
Bahia. The hot sun, the lack of change, all these things contribute to the lack
of motivation people seem to have here. It's nice to enjoy a summer day every
now and then, sipping ice-cold juice and lounging in the sun while kids play in
the street. But when does it end? There's never a cold spell to urge the people
to get back to work, back to school, back to SOMETHING! It's almost
Twilight-Zone-ish. Maybe it only seems that way to me because I only see people
while they're at home. I know that they do have work and school. I just never
see them there. That must be it. Surely, that must be it!
Yesterday as we walked for miles under the hot sun to accompany our
investigators to church, and as one after the other turned us down because of
sore feet, messy houses that needed to be cleaned, a stuffy nose, or a lack of
sleep, I reflected on the words of Alma. Just like him, I found myself wishing,
"Oh! That I were an angel and could have the wish of my heart! That I could go
forth with a voice like a trumpet and preach repentance unto all people!" (Ok,
that's not an exact quote because I'm translating from Português) I wanted to
stand on a mountain and yell so all could hear me in the whole city: "You lazy
people! Wake up and see what's really important! Can't you see that the answer
to all your problems is right here, waiting for you to get off your couches and
accept it?!" And then I thought of Christ, preaching to people who wanted what
He was offering, but weren't willing to do their part to accept it. How
incredibly frustrating that must have been for Him. And then He ended His
mission by suffering for their sins, weaknesses, laziness, pains... everything.
Every person who ever lived, He suffered and died for them. How could He do it?
I marveled over this as I boiled inwardly, making the long walk to church
unaccompanied by those I've been trying so hard to help. How could he take this
heartache over and over again for years and then, having been rejected by the
people, suffer for them?
Then it hit me. He suffered for all in the hope of the few who WOULD
accept His offering. This realization hit me with such force that I burst into
tears (probably freaked out my companion and all of the Brasilians around us on
the road). His hope for the few gave Him the strength and the love necessary to
pay the price for all. I feel like the more I understand the atonement, the less
I comprehend it. What infiinite love! I stand all amazed at my Savior more and
more every day.
As a missionary, I am constantly humbled to represent such a Perfect
Being. And it gives me strength, somehow. The more I recognize how unqualified I
am for this work, the more I rely on Him and see His hand mold me into someone
better. I'm doing this work for Him, because these people are so important to
Him. Every soul is so precious, and I'll keep doing this work, sweating and
teaching all for the hope of the few who are ready now to accept the blessings
of the Gospel.
This Church is true. I know it. I know it, and I can not deny it.
Missionary work is not easy, but it really is worth it, just for the changes I'm
seeing in myself and the lives of others. I know that Jesus Christ lives, that
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is His church, and that He loves
all of you more than you can possibly understand.
Pray to Him. He wants to hear from you.
I love you all!!!
-Sister Whitaker
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